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I Am the King of Catching Colds – and I'm Able to Tell You Ways to Prevent It

At this point the previous year, I found myself participating in a broadcast in the company of three performers. Present were a rapper of Ghanaian heritage, a major pop celebrity, and a famous mezzo-soprano. We were in the heart of winter. Just the night prior, I’d been at an old friend’s 60th birthday, packed into a local bar's party area in a Surrey location. It was an enjoyable evening, however at that moment, simply to make conversation, I questioned how it was possible to avoid catching a cold with many partygoers were players in a symphony of coughs, sneezes, snuffles and nose-blows. Incidentally, why do certain individuals blow their noses so loudly, and some do not? A topic for future discussion.

Their Take from the Three Performers

Upon referencing the party, this trio of troubadours in the waiting area responded in two ways. To begin with, they moved back a bit. Second, they launched into an animated conversation on how to avoid catching colds that understandable due to their profession was a major concern for them. I get that, yet I'm personally involved – preventing colds is crucial for me since my colds are more severe than others'. There's no doctor's note to prove it, but I know it to be true. My illnesses drag on. I experience worse nasal blockage, I have a more irritated throat, I suffer from louder, more relentless coughing spells. My relatives, wise to the couple of quick throat-clearances indicating trouble ahead, often shoo me away or clear the room themselves. Back when I presented football on ITV, my teammates behind the scenes learned to recognize the signals. “Headphones off!” the director would shout to everyone before I deafened them all, overloading their audio gear.

Dealing With Stuffy Noses

As for my blocked noses, don’t start me. Aerosols, liquids, including the intense vapor from heated brandy my mother recommends … they all work for a while before giving up. And there’s nothing as pitiable as the sound of a Birmingham accent spoken without the benefit of air passing through the nostrils. I mean, it's somewhat nasal on a good day. At least this elicits sympathy, though that's not necessarily beneficial. When I started college, separated from family care, the cleaning staff at our accommodation took pity on me. “I know exactly what you need, you dear. I’ll be back in a minute.” She was extremely kind, distinctly Irish, and very insistent that I ate the peeled, raw onion she presented to me. She monitored my consumption. Bless her. No improvement resulted, unfortunately, except for upsetting my stomach and making my breath smell terrible.

The Mezzo-Soprano’s Prevention Strategy

Therefore, I despise catching colds and am convinced prevention beats cure which onion-based or otherwise, fail to help. I focused carefully along with the rapper and the pop star as the singer detailed her prevention methods. Due to upcoming holiday performances, she clearly took it all very seriously. She directed us to use hand gel hourly throughout the winter from what I gathered and, there were special precautions required during festivities. Ahead of any such engagement, she recommended a couple of blasts of Vicks First Defence into both nostrils – regardless of symptoms. Extreme. I appreciated it. And, listen to this, she insisted on following it up later with additional bursts of the same stuff.

My Experience

I followed suit. And I have to say I remained cold-free. It wasn't perfect: the countless bottles of First Defence I bought, mislaid, reacquired, located, and so on. And the disappointing instant you realise you’ve sat on the little vessel of hand gel stored in your pocket and it's oozing out. However, a small cost for the benefit. As the cold season approaches once more, I’m re-armed to the teeth with the mezzo-soprano’s recommended ordnance. I'm set for the fight.

Written by

John Moore

Maya Chen is a cultural critic and writer with a background in sociology, exploring how stories shape our understanding of the world.

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